Kenzo x H&M: Fear, photos and prices

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Marni and a few others aside, the bottom line is that in the various collaborations of H&M and X famous fashion designer has never shone for value, appeal and beauty.

Of course, they have never reached the heights of the unrivalled, unparalleled, incomparable ugliness that is the collaboration between Kenzo and H&M will be in stores from November 3. 

I have only ever felt such confusion steeped in disgust in front of anything ever produced by Vetements, which, along with it’s ongoing sales, continues to be, together with antimatter, one of the worlds many universal mysteries. 

But, by the same principle with which I watch in horror TLC’s Buried Alive, I decided to further investigate the collection.

But first some pictures from the horrifying look book.

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If I owned this I would be ashamed of even donating it to Oxfam.

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She’s even wearing slippers ! – Skirt € 99.

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Her face says it all. Bomber € 129

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Exquisite and understated faux fur with which to go to Lidl to buy courgettes – € 179

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Tiger pretend dress. 149 euro

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Bag of unparalleled ugliness 49,99 EUR

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Sweatshirt to confuse the enemy 79,99 EUR

METALLIC SLIP DRESS: Also known as leaving the house wearing a pink astronaut inspired night gown

Trend

I more often than not leave the house dressed in total black, but due to an aesthetic bipolarity or an incomprehensible law of retaliation I always then regret it and wish to be covered with pink, glittery, gleaming shiny stuff.

I would also like one of those beautiful rhinestones covered vintage inspired makeups that can be seen on Tumblr or Pinterest – but not those nasty things to make up tutorial – and stroll around with a pleated pink top covered in glitter from head to toe like a fairy in a Wes Anderson film.

Basically, sometimes I want to be as shiny as Rihanna the she sings Shine Bright Like A Diamond.

And so I sit in religious silence, nodding my head in quiet approval of this trend while eating Tiger candy.

It all started three years ago with Burberry, then there was Saint Laurent and then came Gucci, but I like to believe this is all thanks to the 80’s and Ziggy Stardust.

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Fashion form the cosmos: Bardot tops

Extra Fashion, Fashion
All these fresh cotton dresses, often with bare shoulders, striped or with gingham prints and the omnipresent ruffles, can only be traced back to a single wonderful person: Brigitte Bardot.
The young Brigitte Bardot of the 60s, ho spent her summers on St. Tropez dressed in gingham dresses and capri pants is one of the most distinctive things ever.
The perfect diva: beautiful with her disheveled hair, totally flirtatious, but with the face of someone who doesn’t have a care in the world, reminiscent of the eternal nymphet described by Nabokov.
Many are divided between Audrey and Marilyn, often generating epic feuds, but I’ve always liked Brigitte, and the image of her freely roaming the little cobbled streets of the Côte d’Azur in her capri pants and with Alain Delon by her side. 
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So there we go, all these ruffles, flounces and frills that have been infesting dresses, tops, swimwear and probably even underwear, remind me of her and I love them.
Having undergone summer trends of neon colours, fringes, colour block and hairy birkenstocks, this year fashion has thankfully reprived us of hideous trends.

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About the joy of the Gucci Garden Capsule Collection

Extra Fashion, Trend
I have never understood nomenclature in chemistry, and never will I understand the number of collections  per brand that come out within the year. 
How many capsule collections is a brand expected to birth per season?
Is the cruise collection before or after pre-fall?
Is pre-fall not just fall?
I can’t precisely answer these questions, all I know is that I can’t buy anything because everything costs so so much and I need to buy food.  The fact remains that for Gucci, ever since Alessandro Micheles arrival, I always yarn and long every item.
A few weeks ago I spent 12 minutes of my life staring at a photo of a Gucci display window, because it was adorned with pink wallpaper and painted swans
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Could a more beautiful wall exist?
Frankly, I think not.
A little while ago the new capsule collection was released, and it involved a new version of the classic ‘flora & Fauna’ print.
It contains flowers, red and blue birds, snakes, carnations, roses and stars.
Speaking of the flowers, Alessandro spoke the following great truth:
I consider myself an animist. I have a great interest in the world of nature, a passion that I think transpires in my collections.
The flowers, for example, are for me the representation of the power of beauty.
I love him, and I want every piece in that collection, because those flowery prints are the kinda things that turn my brain to mush, much like dinosaurs, pineapples, flamingos and banana prints. 

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Extra fashion: 70s Retro t-shirts

Extra Fashion, Fashion
After succumbing to mom jeans, boyfriend jeans, oversized sweaters, culottes pants, off the shoulder tops and bodysuits I frankly do not feel in a position to judge anyone.
Fundamentally I’m the first one who should feel ashamed for their dubious fashion choices, but no, I too often still comply to buying something simply because I saw it on Alexa Chung, totally uncaring of the fact that I may or may not look like a badly dressed dwarf belonging to Durins lineage. 
I go on without a care, convince myself that those baggy flowy mid-calf pants must be mine and nothing, not even the bitter reality reflected in the changing room mirror can stop me: I have to buy them.
I do the same thing with t-shirts. I’ve bought: tigers, eyes, taglines, logos and stripes. Think of an idiot trend that has lasted no more than four months from the past year; I almost certainly have it in my wardrobe, at least in the low cost version.
All this to say that this year the t-shirt style worth buying, as Alexa Chung as demonstrated, is the retro 70s tee.
You know those slightly ‘faded’ t-shirts?
With the contrasting coloured crew neckline?
With vintage logos?
Or with slightly hippy prints?
The mood is therefore clear, and it’s once again Starksy & Hutch, the Jefferesons and Farrah Fawcett. You can find these tees literally everywhere, from Pull&Bear, to Topshop to Etsy and various vintage stores. 

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