Sales stress me out part II

Part two of the sales series. I spoke about how to survive the summer sales you need to prioritize, but I get stressed out none the less.

During these infamous hot & humid summer months we only have one thing to focus on: the summer sales. I’m already projecting myself into the much cooler and much awaited Autumn so my list will include mainly winter pieces, since I’ve had enough of summer already. Leaving aside the self-consciously masochistic choice of any one outlet or low.cost store int he city center, ignoring the possible city warfare that might arise, the possible risk of a divorce/breakup in the case you were to bring your significant other along,  the incoming nervous breakdown in front of two pink sweaters identical only to those foolish mens eyes, that stab in the heart as you stand in front of a Prada bag that you won’t be able to afford even at 70%; if we can leave all this behind, then we’ll see that the real drama creeps in when the dramatic shopping ensues. 

And it happens. To me, it always happens. 

It so happens that you leave the house with the noble intention of reviving the world economy, only to find yourself in tears in the changing room because that Zara dress you so badly wanted makes you look like Christina Aguilera after Christmas dinner.   

And it’s a viscous circle that goes something like this: Mango, what kind of crap is this? If I was to run with these acrylic trousers on I’ll likely end up on fire due to sparks. To buy from Prada I’d have to stop eating entirely, damned skinny Russians, fuck it I shouldn’t have eat so much over Easter, I’ll start the diet tomorrow, I’m not getting presents for anyone next year cause then I’ll have no money, today I can’t even find a white acrylic tank top made in china in H&M,  these black leather pants make my ass look like the back of a bus, on the inter web everything seemed so pretty, you can’t find a black bag even if you look,  I’m surrounded by skinny bitches but then at Zara all that is left are XS, get out of my way with your horrid ombrè. 

Too many expectations, too many confused ideas, too much food swelling, too much stress but more importantly no list.

During sales a detailed list is a necessity. You need a clear plan, a punctual and detailed list of the things we’d like to buy and that would be worth having to even have a minimal chance of survival.

This year, in a casual order, my list goes something like this: 

-Little brown suede ankle boots

-a suede A-line skirt with front buttons

-a new shoulder bag, possibly form Zara

-a mini dress

-new running shoes

-a pair of comfy slip-ons

-a beanie/ woolly hat, since my ex-boyfriend still has my beloved blue one -moment of sadness-

-Bell bottom jeans form Mango, since the 70s are in vougue.

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